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E-Newsletter

April, 2006

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Welcome to this month's issue of the Better Kid Care E-Newsletter - A newsletter for those caring for children.

Notable Quote: “If the person you are talking to doesn't appear to be listening be patient; it may simply be that he has a small piece of fluff in his ear.” ~ Winnie the Pooh

In this issue:

Remember! Celebrate NAEYC's Week of the Young Child April 2 – 8 "Building Better Futures for all Children" and . . . TV Turnoff Week April 24 – 30

Tips for Child Care Providers

Provider Appreciation Day - May 12, 2006

Provider Appreciation Logo

Provider Appreciation Day is a special day to recognize child care providers, teachers, and educators of young children everywhere.

It takes a dedicated person to succeed in the demanding world of today's child care profession. Provider Appreciation Day offers a unique opportunity to recognize and commend the unselfish dedication, compassion, and strong family values that child care providers demonstrate every day.

Individuals and groups can network with other child care groups and begin to plan events, schedule media coverage, and issue proclamations. Notify parents, community groups, and government leaders so that they, too, can participate in this important recognition event. Contact National Provider Appreciation Day at 1-888-3-FIRST-1(1-888-334-7781) or visit http://www.providerappreciation.org

Where do you find the best ideas on caring for children? From child care providers, of course! Do you have a great tip or good thing? Send us your best tips in writing and your tip may end up in our newsletter! If your tip is chosen for the newsletter, you will receive a little something from the Better Kid Care Program. Mail tips with your return address, place of work, and the number and ages of those you care for to:

Better Kid Care Program
c/o Christine Belinda
Tips from Child Care Providers
253 Easterly Parkway
State College, PA 16801
E-mail to: crb16@psu.edu

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Feature Article

Hold My Hand: Gentle Guiding for the Misguided

by Christine Belinda

We have all seen the difficult behaviors that may encompass early childhood development; behaviors that simply seem to be a part of growing, learning, and "becoming." Some examples may be whining, crying, yelling, snatching, hitting, biting, and refusing to follow directions. Challenging behaviors will almost always show their face in our work, but with knowledge, deeper understanding, and heart, we can gently guide misguided behaviors.

Understanding Behavior

Are these types of behaviors misguided? Or are they a consequence of something that is too difficult for the child or a message that we need to hear (Hold my hand and help me please!)? Almost all behaviors are a form of communicating something.

Behaviors may look inappropriate to us as adults, but may carry a different meaning to the child. Do we really know why the behavior occurred? Do we know this child's developmental abilities? Have we thought about the child's background, culture, or even events that have happened that day? Or do we just know what the behavior was (and that we don't like it!)? We must look at many factors that paint the whole picture before we can begin to guide.

Adult talking to boy

For Example:

Dillon is placed in time-out after hitting his friend, who wouldn't give up his toy jeep. The behavior has been stopped, but do we know why Dillon hit? Has Dillon been shown or modeled appropriate choices? Does Dillon feel good about himself after sitting in time-out?

Search to Understand

We often jump ahead in trying to stop the immediate behavior, missing the clues to understanding and guiding the behavior. In this case, the hitting is important to stop, but it is equally important to figure out why the child is using this action and how to guide better choices and model appropriate behaviors.

After talking to Dillon, we realize he has the same jeep at home and he thought it was his. Dillon is a young three-year-old and is still working on self control, has been showing some signs of language delays, and has a new sibling at home. Also, a co-worker reported that he had a difficult separation with his mom this morning. With this information, we can begin to understand his actions as well as brainstorm positive ways to guide.

We can start by adding words to identify his feelings. Stooping down to Dillon's eye level, we might say, "You were so mad when you thought Jill had your jeep." We can provide encouragement and offer choices for positive conflict resolution. "Let's go talk to Jill and see if this is your jeep from home or it's the one from school. Would you like to tell her you would like a turn when she is done with the jeep?" (The next week, the provider made sure to place extra jeeps in the car basket to help with taking turns.)

With limited language ability, there is a need to model short phrases such as "my turn," "please," or "no, thanks" or to consider using sign language techniques to help in communicating. It is also important to use visuals (pictures, photographs, labels) to assist in communicating.

Hold my Hand

Adult talking to toddlerChildren exhibiting difficult behaviors need adults to help them learn new, appropriate ways to behave, not to be punished or to miss the opportunity to learn better choices. Children are not bad, but they may need guidance. They need adults to hold their hands; to show them they care. Think of how wonderful it feels to gently hold hands with someone you care about and also take guidance from someone who is positive and who understands you. Think also what it feels like to be yelled at or made to feel bad.

It is difficult to not add our opinions when negative behaviors occur; however, it is crucial we do not. Our job is to help the child, not form opinions that may hurt the child. For example, Colin is telling everyone what to do in the blocks and also won't share. We could think he's bossy and mean. How does this help Colin learn to cooperate? How does this help the group learn to resolve problems? How does it help our relationship with Colin? It doesn't.

Instead, we can see that Colin needs support socially. We may try holding Colin's hand and saying, "You have a lot of ideas you want to try in the blocks. How can we try your idea as well as share the blocks?" Colin will not be judged for his social development limits, but will be guided to making better choices; a good start!

Be prepared

Boy wrestling

Some challenging behaviors completely take us by surprise, but often we are given clues to children's behaviors and behavior patterns. Knowing these clues will help us in meeting the child's needs and helping everyone to stay calm. Be alert to behaviors that seem out of place, factors in the environment that cause distress (too much noise, not enough materials), or times of the day problems occur (before lunch, circle time).

For instance, when the teacher says it's clean-up time, Sara consistently falls apart; crying, yelling, and showing frustration. It is a recurring pattern and is exhausting the teachers. Instead of being unprepared, the staff decides to meet and brainstorm ideas to try and support Sarah, as well as share their ideas on why they think this behavior is occurring.

The staff came up with many helpful ideas:

  • They noticed Sara is really hungry at snack time, which is right after clean-up. Snack will now be offered at an earlier time, during free play, to those who want it (one less transition, too!).
  • They observed that transitions in general are hard for Sara. They now will try to have an adult near Sara during transitions for support. One staff will go over to Sara ten minutes before clean-up to help her get ready: "It's getting close to clean- up, so I'm going to finish my drawing. What are you going to do, Sara?" This helps Sara prepare and make plans for change.
  • The staff created a place where children's work can be saved, so they can be reassured to come back to their work at another time.
  • In looking at this problem, they felt their free play time was too short and now have decided to extend their free play time to support children's play.
  • They put into place a new clean-up signal. A gentle wind chime is used to give signals; first chime means five more minutes until clean-up, second chiming means it is time to clean-up.
  • Sara's family has noticed she learns visually. The staff has decided to use photographs and pictures to support classroom happenings such as schedules, rules, materials, and transitions.

Brainstorming together and planning ahead are valuable ways to positively guide behaviors as well as ward off negative behaviors.

Gentle guiding tips

Adult talking to child

Our ultimate goal is to help children positively and appropriately control their actions and reactions. Gentle guiding will help support this goal. Consider the following gentle guiding tips:

  • Stay calm, positive, and refer to your training, research, and other professionals, if needed, regarding behavior.
  • Consider the whole picture (development, moods, needs, happenings, disabilities, etc.) when trying to understand behavior.
  • Support emotional development (read stories about feelings, role play, label/discuss feelings).
  • Offer problem-solving choices and encourage children to be involved in resolving conflicts; their ideas are important.
  • Give children opportunities to be successful and encourage their ideas.
  • State rules positively and clearly (we walk inside, we use gentle hands, ask first).
  • Be sure rules, environment, materials, and experiences match each child's abilities.
  • Accept that children have different temperaments and they may require different approaches to supporting.
  • Acknowledge that behavior takes time to change, but also know when to seek outside help and be sure to communicate and be in contact with the family and your co-workers.

Most importantly, be ready each day to take the hand of children and gently guide towards positive experiences!

Better Kid Care resources are available for child care providers by contacting your local Penn State Cooperative Extension office.

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Distance Education Highlights

Learn Lots on Your Time

Enjoy the following highlights from one of the many Better Kid Care Distance Education Lessons. Participate in Distance Education training in the convenience of your home.

Better Kid Care Distance Education Program awards:

  • Continuing Education Units CEUs)
  • Keystone STARS required training hours
  • Department of Public Welfare training hours
  • Act 48 hours for certified
  • Child Development Associate (CDA) Training

Let's Look at Time-Out

Sad boy

Have you ever put a child in time-out and then asked him why he is there? Many times the answer is, "I don't know." Have you ever struggled with a child to get her to stay in a time-out chair? If you have done these things, you have probably found yourself wondering, "Is this really working?"

Time-out was introduced to child care programs in the 1980s and 1990s. Over time child care providers who adopted time-out noticed that many children didn't remember why they had been put in time-out. Caregivers began to suggest that children use the time to think about what they had done. Unfortunately, it is clear that effective self-criticism is an adult skill, and not something most young children can do. Young children learn best when they are taught the behavior at the time when they need to learn it.

Girl talking to adult

In all types of learning, we try to discover what children misunderstand by speaking to them and listening to them. Discipline is no different. Speaking and listening are powerful ways to communicate what we expect and want. Communication that combines caring and direction are proven techniques that help children develop confidence and self-control.

When we understand why time-out was introduced and used, we better understand its place in child care and if we help children develop in an atmosphere of support and guidance, time-out may no longer be necessary.

Still wondering?...

How time-out got started?

Why time-out doesn't always work?

How to use time-out in the right way?

What about time-out with infants and toddlers?

View the complete Distance Education lesson Let's Look at Time-out.

To view a complete listing of all distance education lessons and additional information and resources, visit the Better Kid Care Distance Education page.

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Health and Safety Tips

National Child Abuse Prevention Month - April 2006

Prevention People

Safe Children and Healthy Families are a Shared Responsibility is the theme of the 2006 National Child Abuse Prevention Month in April. Community Resource Packets are available from the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services Children's Bureau, Office on Child Abuse and Neglect (OCAN) and its National Clearinghouse on Child Abuse and Neglect Information.

The packet, in both English and Spanish, contains practical information on how individuals, organizations, and communities can support and strengthen families. A corresponding poster is included in each packet. The Community Resource Packet and poster can be downloaded at nccanch.acf.hhs.gov . Packets and posters can also be ordered by contacting the National Clearinghouse on Child Abuse and Neglect Information at 1.800.394.3366 or nccanch@caliber.com . "Tools for Child Abuse Prevention Month" 2006 Child Abuse Prevention Month Packet (PDF)

Satellite Training

The Penn State Better Kid Care Program has developed a new and exciting season of interesting, helpful satellite topics for 2005-2006. Join with many other caregivers in experiencing live satellite training workshops, offered through the Penn State Better Kid Care Program, in Pennsylvania and across the United States . To participate in these workshops, visit the Satellite Workshop link.

  • April 6, 2006 Parents: Friends or Foes?
  • May 11, 2006 How to Get Parents on Your Team

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Turn the Page

Great Books to Read with Children

Reading



Reading aloud with children is a wonderful activity. Children of all ages love to be read to. Support the love of reading for children in your care by trying the following books:



Jamaica 's Find
, by Juanita Havill, published by Houghton Mifflin, ISBN 0395453577. This is a great book for addressing the concept of right and wrong. Children can help Jamaica solve her dilemma.

When Sophie Gets Angry...Really, Really Angry! by Molly Bang, published by Blue Sky Press, ISBN 0590189794. This story gives words and portrays wonderful images helping describe a child's strong emotions. Children will identify with all the intense places Sophie's anger takes her, but will be comforted by the safety and love of her family, as well as her slow steps to self-control.

The Hurt, by Teddi Doleski, published by Paulist Press, ISBN 0809165511. Justin feels hurt by a friend who calls him a name: "Like a big round stone, all cold and hard." Justin finally talks about the hurt to his father. This is a good story to brainstorm conflict resolution ideas as well as identify feelings and actions of friends.

More great books:

The Temper Tantrum Book, by Edna Mitchell Preston, published by Puffin, ISBN 040501819

Join In and Play (Learning to Get Along), by Cheri Meiners, published by Free Spirit Press, ISBN 1575421526

Share and Take Turns, by Cheri Meiners, published by Free Spirit Press, ISBN 1575421240

I Am Sharing (Toddler Books), by Mercer Mayer, published by Random House Books for Young Readers, ISBN 06786349X

Contact your local children's library or your local Penn State Cooperative Extension office to find out about more books on making friends and child care. Reading with children creates lifelong readers. Enjoy your time reading with children!

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Better Kid Care Resources

Providers in the CDA (Child Development Associate) Program

Better Kid Care Distance Education Lessons are now coded in a format to help in planning CDA training (based on the 120 hours of formal education /training needed and the eight content areas). View codes and lesson titles in the Penn State Better Kid Care Distance Education Brochure.

For information regarding Child Development Associate, contact Christine at 814-865-7894 or email: crb16@psu.edu.

Better Kid Care Mentoring Telephone Help Line for Child Care Providers in Pennsylvania

Do you have questions about caring for other people's children, such as:

Nancy on phone
  • How do I get a child to eat?
  • Why won't a child share?
  • How do I stop a child from biting other children?
  • What should I do when a parent doesn't pay on time?

Call the Better Kid Care Mentoring Line at 800-859-8340 or e-mail your questions to betterkidcare@psu.edu for information about child care and children's issues.

New Staff Orientation curriculum is available to child care centers in Pennsylvania. This curriculum is specifically designed for new staff members in child care centers. Included are a thirty-page workbook and thirty units on seven videotapes. The easy-to-understand information is reinforced with activities and assignments. Units are designed to be used during nap time or other small blocks of time as staff/child ratios permit. Meets the Keystone STARS Performance Standards. Click on the New Staff Orientation link for more information and to view the materials online.

Home-Based Caregiver Orientation Meets the Keystone STARS Core Series Training Requirements - This three part series shows how to establish, run and maintain a successful child care business and presents important information about understanding and supporting the developmental needs of each child.

3 books
  • Part 1 - Family Child Care...It's a Business
  • Part 2 - Understanding and Supporting
    Children's Physical and Cognitive Development
  • Part 3 - Understanding and Supporting
    Children's Language and Social/Emotional Development

 

Visit: Home-Based Caregiver Orientation to view materials online.

Receive the videos and workbooks in the mail. Complete the entire series and return assignments to the Better Kid Care office for review to earn six PA Department of Public Welfare training hours. To order: 800-452-9108 or betterkidcare@psu.edu

Better Kid Care Kit - Do you provide care for children in your home? The kit, which is free for Pennsylvania residents, includes booklets with activities, child care ideas, information about distance education training, a children's development chart, and much more. Complete our on-line registration form or call 800-452-9108 to order.

Resources for Families - The monthly issue of Family Time / Work Time contains short articles and tips for busy working parents. Parents Count has information for parents on children's issues that are featured in training workshops for child care providers. Both publications are available online to print and share with your friends, family, and other childcare providers. Select issues are also available in Spanish.

Would you like to receive this newsletter? New subscribers can join and have this newsletter delivered to their e-mail mailbox by sending mail to: BetterKidCareNews-subscribe-request@lists.psu.edu.
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View archived Better Kid Care E-Newsletters

Upcoming May E-Newsletter:
The Language Connection

Reflections:

We would love to hear from you! We want the Better Kid Care E-Newsletter to be informative, useful, and inspiring to you! Please contact the Better Kid Care Program with your ideas. Is there something you want to see more or less of? What information is most important to you? What topics are you interested in? How is the newsletter helpful to you? E-mail your ideas to crb16@psu.edu or call 814-865-7894.

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